Focus: Family Communication and Self-Expression
Goal: Build routine to communicate about feelings or questions children may have regarding a parental illness.
Materials needed:
- Strips of paper
- Crayons/pens/markers/paint pens
- Jar or mailbox container to put strips of paper in. This container can be plain and simple, or the family can decorate it using a variety of materials.
Instructions:
- Let the children know that regular family meetings will begin throughout each week or month (whatever the agreed timeline is).
- Encourage children to write or draw ideas on the strips of paper whenever they have a thought, feeling, or question about things (parental illness or other). For younger children, they can also place items in the container that may represent or help communicate how they feel. Parents should also add their thoughts to the container to model the process of sharing feelings and questions.
- When it’s time for the family meeting, you can start by expressing appreciation for the family working on the activity together. You may want to share your hopes for the meetings, review a few general “rules” for the meeting (e.g., use a “talking stick” (or other item) – when you have this, you may talk, otherwise it is your turn to listen.”), and emphasize that there is no right or wrong way to feel. Also, important to mention how feelings typically come and go (i.e., you will get a reprieve from hard feelings).
Additional comments:
If big questions come up, it’s okay to not have an answer and/or to request a little more time to think about it and come back to it at another point (that day or another). Throughout the conversation, reflecting the child’s feelings may be helpful, “That seems like it really worries you,” or “You are feeling sad when you think about that.” This can help children feel understood and validated.
